Love the Racism Out of You

Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. 

Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that. 

-- MLK

I talked about how racist attitudes and acts of racism are always rooted in cowardice and self-hatred in a previous post.

If that is true, doesn't that change everything about how we ought to approach racism in this country?

We often approach racism this way:  We condemn racism itself and the people who hold racist beliefs. Then we focus on lifting up the people whom racism has oppressed.

That seems logical, right?  Racists have all the power and have used it to hurt others, so to make the situation right they need to lose that power and be reprimanded.

But what if racists don't feel like they have power?  What if, on some level, they feel like they are the victims? 

After all, racism comes out of fear--always. I'm talking about the kind of fear so deep most people often don't know they have it, but their actions speak for themselves. Why else would people work hard to oppress another group unless they were worried about what this group would do on a level playing field? Why else would they spend so much time hating what another group is doing?  Isn't their life, their family and their work enough to keep themselves interested? Don't they believe in themselves?

It gets more complicated because racism, bigotry and discrimination are problems every person struggles with. It's endemic in the human condition, or at least in human culture. It can flare up in anyone and many keep it on the back burner simmering. But to the extent that either racism is "true" for any of us, whether it's in small ways for some or larger ways for others, I would argue the same lessons probably hold true. Racism may be like greed. Some multi-millionaires revolve their lives around greed while for others it's a more occasional misstep. But whether it's all-consuming or an occasional tendency, it is still coming out of sin, and that sin is tied to fear and that fear is tied to insecurity.

What sin are we talking about? Breaking the 1st commandment. People have their confidence and pride in something other than the awesome Mystery of God. And despite what it looks like, pride is always trying to cover up shame--a lack of self-worth or self-esteem. Feelings of superiority are always masking fears of inferiority. Always. The psychologist Alfred Adler made that point many years ago. Hated of others is always tried to a deeper, often hidden, self-hatred.

That's why it's rarely successful to "beat the racism" out of someone, whether in an actual war with bullets or in a fiery online debate. Attacking someone who is fearful is not likely to inspire them to move through and beyond their fear--rather, it actually validates the legitimacy of their fears ("You see? I was attacked so my fear was justified all along!") In short: We have to love the racism out of folks. Society still needs to send a message and condemn racism, but that alone won't cause transformation in hearts and minds.

We know that racism in the U.S. was fueled by a cruel system of manipulation: Poor whites were pitted against poor blacks. It served the wealthy and powerful for the poor people to squander their energy fighting against each other so they would never organize and recognize their common enemy. The wealthy were not sharing any of their riches with the poor whites, but they gave them a sense of pride in their "whiteness." And some of those folks were so poor the only thing of value they had was their whiteness, so they have fought hard to keep the racial pecking order in place as a result. It's a twisted system.

Can we convince white people that their future will be better without racism? Can we convince them that there is a place for them in a more open, diverse, inclusive world? Can we convinced them that they have value as they are so they don't need to spend energy hating another group? They don't need racism in order to feel secure in this world. Can we convince them to let go of white privilege, which has given them much but also creates unrealistic expectations that make white people so volatile and fragile? Many white folks cannot envision themselves in a vibrantly diverse America of tomorrow. They have been convinced that they have nothing to gain there and much to lose. Can we show them that there is a bright future for them, too?

And if so, how do we do this?

Conclusion

If racism and other bigotry is rooted in fear--and I think it's clear that it is--then we should approach the issue with that firmly in mind. You can't scare the fear out of someone or beat or punish the fear out of someone. Or win legal cases. All of that will be perceived as a loss and will only work to strengthen the fear and persecution complex. All these will just work to convince a fearful person that they were right to be fearful because negative consequences are coming their way. But if we can get to the point where white people do not see Civil Rights victories as a loss but instead see that it is a win-win for all of us, then we can start healing that core fear. What I'm arguing is similar in a way that union organizers of years gone by worked to build a class consciousness and build solidarity--'that man over there is not my enemy but my comrade and we'll both get farther if we see our commonality and work together.'

Arming Teachers: The Intersection of White Male Privilege and Anti-Democratic Impulses

The subject of arming teachers has again surfaced given recent legislation in Florida allowing the practice. 

This idea is absurd. However, it persists because, I believe, it sits at the intersection of hot-button issues of  gender, privilege and power. These are much deeper than simply a question of gun usage. These issues are key in an ongoing tug-of-war for the soul of this nation.

A friend who is a lifelong educator wrote: 

I strongly object to any teacher being armed. I believe if a person with a gun is in a school that person should be a genuine experienced police officer. Handling a gun, shooting with a gun, and becoming effective as a shooter can be trained into some people but developing the needed understanding, rapid decision making skills, and having a keen awareness of all the dangers in a shooter situation takes experience, practice, knowledge and commitment. How is a teacher going to do that while at the same time handling their responsibilities with their students? This is like a secret service job title. I am fearful that one of these well-meaning teachers will become a fine example of why this is a very stupid idea.

MY RESPONSE: What he describes is exactly what some people want. They want to take people who are relaxed, confident, independent and thoughtful and turn them into trained gunmen who react.

Why in the world would anyone want this? Two reasons come to the top. 

First: It serves some politically. As the Ancient Greeks taught us, true freedom and independence comes through education, NOT weaponry. When you are skilled at critical thinking--so that you can sift through information to arrive at your own conclusions and be confident in your conclusions--then you are not easily manipulated by fear rhetoric, fake news or the mob mentality. As a result, education makes you confident and relaxed. However, many do not like a truly free population, so keeping them afraid, armed and on alert changes the psychology of the population dramatically and makes certain things politically possible that would otherwise not be possible. If you want to erode democracy and install authoritarianism, this is an essential step. An armed and fearful population is the easiest for a government to control (which is ironic since so many gun rights supporters see gun ownership as the means to stave off bad governments when it's actually the easiest way to get them).

Second: White male dominance. There is a group of people--especially white males who are not college educated--who have been told all their lives that it is their job to be dominant in society. They have been told they will simply earn that through their natural skills and abilities, and they disregard at face value that any of this achievement comes through structural privilege. But their world is slipping away. Women and people of other races and ethnicities are gaining power more and more. What is the desperate insecure white male to do? He tries to augment himself to get the power he has been told he deserves and merits. He uses steroids, he drives big, loud trucks and he keeps himself armed. I actually feel bad for him, because he feels inadequate--society tells him its his birthright to be the big dog but the facts of the world tell him that he's only average, so he desperately tries to do something to live up to those unfair expectations on him.

HERE'S THE KEY: As long as the world lives and dies based on who has guns and who doesn't, then the one calling the shots (literally) still has all the power. As long as everyone is walking around armed all day, then the uneducated white male with the gun is still the big dog in society--he's still necessary--everything is all based on him--he trains and coaches everyone--and All. Eyes. Are. On. Him. 

If you take away guns, you take away his very identity and his role, and he will feel like you are taking HIM away. It's not true, but the perception is true which is why so many fight so hard to keep their guns. They have internalized that those guns are literally an extension of themselves, so they are fighting to keep them as if their very life depends on it--and it does, but not in the way they think. It's only their PERCEPTION that their identity depends on it, because the chances of them needing their guns because of a pending gunfight at the O.K. Corral are pretty slim.

In the movies, it is almost always the white, western male who saves the day and who naturally takes command. In real life, the person who saves the day might be that Muslim doctor wearing a hijab who performed flawless heart surgery on you. It could be a female politician who commands attention and sets policy. It could be an African-American male who programmed your computer. The gap here between expectations and reality is significant and people will try to address it in better and worse ways. We blame white males for being "insecure" and "fragile" but it is actually quite unfair to put these expectations on them.

The key here is not beat up on white men for being insecure but in reducing unrealistic expectations. White men have only been dominant through complex layers of privilege, NOT by their own super powers or merit. They ARE just average--just like everyone else--and that's perfectly good!

Third: Lack of Will. It would be negligent to talk about this issue without mentioning that the inability of our nation to address gun violence by the most sensible means possible means that we are going to be facing increasingly ridiculous and absurd alternatives, such as arming classroom teachers. What are those sensible means? They certain include better regulation of weapons. Many of the weapons currently circulating in the civilian population are the type that should only be kept by the military--no different than tanks, missiles and aircraft carriers. Speaking of military, if you ever walk onto a military base you won't see weapons brandished randomly by individuals at their own discretion.  Rather, they are stored safely and only come out under the supervision and regulation of a chain of command. Regulation works. The inability of our society to effectively stop the entrenched bullying of this special interest minority means we continue to fail the people living in our society by doing what's right.

The themes in this blog post dovetail with a previous piece entitled How White Male Privilege Leads to Fragility and Violence.